7 Steps to Flunk Your CLEP and Waste Money

7 steps to fail!

1. Buy a new textbook. Someone has to buy all the new editions that textbook publishers are rolling out. Why rent a book for two weeks when you can pay full price for a book you’ll never read again? Way to support the local economy!

2. Study on your bed. Who needs a separate study space? Incorporate your studies into your life. I hear that if you sleep on your textbook, all the knowledge will magically fly into your brain. It’s called osmosis. It also helps if you rip up the pages and put them in a cereal bowl, pour milk, and eat it up. But your bed is one of the most comfortable places in the house…and it’s okay to take study naps.

3. Don’t study now. Study later. Life happens. Isn’t that why you are taking the CLEP? Don’t let your coach coerce you into studying. They don’t understand that you have a life and places to be. So go on that road trip to Disneyland with your friends. You can always study in the car on the way back.

4. Don’t take notes. Your brain is your best resource. Instead of wasting paper and trees, just read bold print of your textbook and memorize the glossary. You’ll remember everything. Really. You memorized the alphabet didn’t you? There’s no reason why you can’t memorize the entire biology textbook. Notes are for the weak-brained.

5. Ignore the study guide. Who do they think they are, trying to help you out with the test? It’s practically cheating. Those sneaky people at the College Board are just trying to earn a few extra bucks by providing you with an “official” guide. Psst. It’s probably not even for the right exam. They just want to take your money and help you flunk.

6. Add 500 new friends on Facebook. College is about friends. Facebook is about friends. So it just makes sense to spend your afternoon study session connecting with other college students across the US. Especially if they spell their first name the same way you do, think umbrellas are for the weak, and are your neighbors in Farmville. Life is about relationships, not education, right?

7. Cram the night before. This is a very popular option. Keep your brain clear from any unneeded studying material for as long as possible. Then, the night before, your brain will be primed for receiving new knowledge. Make a couple pots of coffee and study all night! Repeat the process. If your hands aren’t shaking by the time you reach the testing center, you aren’t ready.

Unlike whomever wrote this article, CollegePlus! can help you pass your test while saving time and money. Hundreds of students have gotten their degree utilizing our approach. You could be the next one. Want to learn more? Click here for a free information packet

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3 comments so far - Leave a comment below

Very cute article, and thought-provoking to the young student. Regarding the italicized post script, shouldn't that read, "whoever wrote this article," rather than, "whomever"?

— Tammy Tuesday, July 6, 2010 2:58 PM CDT

哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈 I think I did all of those except for number 5 for one test or another. Number 1 is the only one I didn't get to follow very much for the Cleps. Good times.

— Tim Feig Tuesday, July 6, 2010 2:38 PM CDT

Tammy -
Glad you enjoyed the blog post. We use the AP Stylebook for grammar guidelines. Whomever is accepted by their guidelines. Thanks for pointing it out!

— Admin Wednesday, July 7, 2010 9:23 AM CDT

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